Ten Fab Four Titles Adapted For The Current Crisis Essay

Two items caught my attention simultaneously last week, both regarding musical artists. The first involved Morrissey and his old band the Smiths, whom I follow on twitter.

Numerous tweets identified Morrissey titles which, simply by changing a word or two, could relate to the current COVID-19 crisis. My favorite among them was “Stockpilers of the World Take Over”, a clever take substituting the first noun in place of shoplifters.

Just as I was reading the tweet “Meet Is Murder,” the radio station played a similar virus-based take on an early hit by The Beatles. “I want to wash my hand” sang John Lennon and Paul McCartney, according to this adaptation of one of the group’s first number one hits.

Immediately, other songs by the Fab Four came to mind, some of which could be easily adapted for the current virus. Here are ten of them.

1. Step Back
Instead of telling Jo Jo and Loretta to get back, this song insist that they retreat at least six feet.

2. Maskman
George Harrison’s portrait of the greedy tax collector on Revolver could be transformed into the producer of surgical masks needed to prevent the spreading of the virus.

3. I Get By With a Little Help From Netflix
Billy Shears, or Ringo Starr, might presently thank TV networks or streaming services for aiding him through the quarantine.

4. Here, Here, and Ever Here
Since no one is allowed to go “there and everywhere,” the first place in the title is the only option.

5. Being for the Benefit of Mr. Skype!
Thanks to the face to face device, it is possible without leaving your room to watch Mr. Kite fly through the ring, Mr. H demonstrate ten somersaults, and Henry the Horse dance the waltz.

6. None Together Now
Whereas the original Yellow Submarine song encouraged us to all join as one, the social distancing of today requires the opposite.

7. Don’t Let Me Out
This title was recorded with “in” as the last word, but now it has changed to help us overcome the temptation to leave our homes.

8. Eight Weeks a Day
Being stuck inside makes for indistinguishable and interminable days, thus the rearrangement of this classic.

9. Ticket to Hide
The girl that lives with me is not going away, so the only ticket she can procure is one that allows her to keep in hiding from the outside world.

10. We Can Work (It) Out In
Gyms across the country have been shut down, so you have to complete your aerobic and strength routines at home.